Gems from the Net

 Shrink This...

Susan met the psychiatrists, and routed them.  "I agreed to meet one psychiatrist in the VA system. Six showed up at the meeting.  They sat there like frogs sitting on a log, staring at me without blinking. I stared right back and grinned at their foolishness. Finally the one I should have been meeting alone said, 'You don't like psychiatrists, do you?'
'No.'
There was more silence and more staring to wear me down. Then another asked why.
'Because witch doctors have proven to be nine times more effective than psychiatrists, and THEY only charge half as much per visit.' I smiled, but got nothing but scowl in return, so I added the rest. 'The kicker is that witch doctors only need 3 visits at the most to work their magic while psychiatrists require a lifetime, and still end up with nothing but another drug addict.'"
Susan grimaces.  "I guess the truth hurts.  When I went down to the cafeteria they were all sitting there drinking placebos."

Company Yacht
Now Available to employees

Our company now has a yacht available for the use of employees. This compact, eleven foot aluminum model has a single, three stroke, kinetic thrust engine. This can be upgraded to two, three, or even four kinetic thrust engines as easily as inviting your friends over for a picnic.
The ballast is three feet deep, four foot across and there are three sun-splashed decks for the crew and whatever complacent passengers you can find. It is superbly stable, wallows little, and, it holds rain water amazingly well. Why, this Lincoln of the Lake even floats. Reservations are required.


http://www.talewins.com/Browzer/Fun.htm